Everytime I try to get clean and sober and food binge/purge free, I feel like I’m losing my fucking mind. I KNOW it’s probably just PAWS (post-acute withdrawal syndrome…PLEASE educate yourself on this if you or a loved one suffers from addiction and is in early recovery) but it makes it really hard to stay on track. Emotional overreaction? Yup. Definitely just broke down over a Facebook exchange that was truly just good-natured banter but ultimately left me feeling like, as usual, I’m ‘too much’…And then Kristen jokingly said she would hide me on the feed because she couldn’t follow what I was saying We’ve also kidded about how I post incessantly and excessively, so I naturally recalled that and all I heard was rejection and my own berating voice saying, “There you go again, being too much of you.” And here I go again being that overly sensitive kid I can’t blame my parents for not knowing how to handle. I don’t want people to feel like they have to walk on eggshells around me and for the most part, I can laugh at myself better than anyone and shrug it off for the absurdity I know it to be, but now enter a scrambled neurochemistry and long history of emotional dysregulation and I’m apt to cry over a joke that I started. I fucking hate it and I KNOW better. And I know why and that it will eventually get better if I stay clean and sober and I am able to align my heart and body more consistently with my rational head knowledge..but it still sucks right now.